The Mindset Traps that Make Laundry Harder for Moms

The Mindset Traps that Make Laundry Harder for Moms

Jul 05, 2024

This post is all about managing laundry as a mom.

Managing Laundry For Moms

If you’re like me — and most of the moms I surveyed — one of the household tasks you wish were easier to manage is the laundry. That and planning what’s for dinner.

One thing they have in common is how relentless they are.

Story time...

I have this vivid memory of a scene from when we lived in San Francisco and had two under two. I was sitting on the floor in this awkward “foyer” space downstairs in the back of our San Francisco cottage. This area housed a crib and the intersection of our bathroom and bedroom hallway, with French doors leading outside to the fenced-in postage stamp backyard, where you’d find a closet containing our washer/dryer.

I had just done the laundry earlier in the week, but I was SURROUNDED by heaps of dirty laundry. Baby clothes, toddler clothes, my husband’s clothes (including stinky muddy workout gear because somehow he had the time to go for trail runs, not that I was jealous), all my clothes with sour-smelling spit-up stains, spit-up-upon blankets, spit-up-upon burp cloths, sullied changing pads, sheets, towels, kitchen rags galore because I was in a phase of my pursuit of zero waste where I didn’t allow paper towels. And I was crying.

My husband walks into this scene and asks, “What’s wrong?!”

And I sobbed, “It’s just so much. It never ends.”

We all know I wasn’t just talking about the laundry.

I know you've been there.

Feeling overwhelmed with a crying baby, sleepless nights, or sick little ones. The laundry hampers overflowing with dirty laundry from every family member. The dreaded piles of laundry in various stages of completion. Even the folded clothes mocking you to put them away but for some unknown reason that always feels like the hardest step. You can't remember the last time you changed the sheets. Dammit, you forgot to flip a load from the washing machine, and now those clothes and the machine smell like a swamp.

Moms these days often feel that managing the laundry management is one of the biggest issues. You dream of finding the best laundry hacks and the simplest ways to get through this chore faster. But the mountains of laundry never end, and you’re in desperate need of streamlining the process. With each passing day, the cycle continues, leaving you exhausted and feeling like there’s no end in sight.

When it comes to the laundry, if you don’t stay on top of it, it can be so hard to dig yourself back out. That’s why you need a system that fits into the rhythms of your days, weeks, and months.

That's why I made the mini-course Ready Set Moms Do Laundry

In it you get:

All the reasons this chore is so hard (no judgment here)
Loads of ideas to make it easier (take what works!)
A framework that lets you build a system that is simple and sustainable

Laundry may feel like a necessary evil, but with the right-for-you system, you can make it a less time-consuming part of your daily routine. Imagine having extra time for other things you care about. Imagine the lightness you'll feel without those piles and heaps and hampers cluttering your space and your mind. That’s the ultimate goal of Ready Set Moms Do Laundry — to help moms like you and me feel lighter.

Imagine never thinking about laundry again because it's become an automatic system that everyone in your household contributes to.

I’d love to help you simplify and systematize this task!

In the course I reveal the 5 Laundry Mindset Traps, and then give you 5 resets that are actually helpful. Here’s a sample:

Laundry Mindset Trap #1: No one does it the right way, so I have to do it myself.

Mindset Reset: I know myself. I know my kids. I know what matters to me.

If you stop and ask why you’ve been doing laundry the way you do — a way that doesn’t in fact work for you — chances are it’s because it’s the way you’ve always done it, or the way you think it’s SUPPOSED to be done, or the way your mom did it.

Let me share how knowing myself, knowing my kids, and knowing what’s important to me, helped me design the laundry system we use in our family:

It’s important to me to look somewhat put together. But I also have no interest in spending time ironing. So I’ve streamlined my wardrobe to include only favorites that don’t require pressing or dry cleaning. Comfort + convenience + personal style for the win.

It’s important to me that my kids take responsibility for their stuff, including their clothes. That’s more important to me than them folding things and putting them away “my way.”

It’s important to me that my closet and drawers feel organized. I’ve always been this way. When I was a child my room would be an utter disaster but my closet and drawers were neat and tidy.

Having a tidy closet is not important to my daughter. Can I let her have it her way with her things? Do I feel learning these skills would help her? If she lets it get messy, does it slow her down getting dressed in the morning? Does it stress her out? Answering these questions will guide me in how to guide her.

With things like this, pausing to ask questions and observe can be more important than having it done “right.”

Making environmentally friendly choices is important to me. We live in the high desert, so running a dryer feels wasteful to me when I could hang things out to dry. So when the weather allows and I have the time, I feel good about doing the extra steps. But I’m not going to be diehard about it — if doing the easier thing and shifting clothes from the washer to the dryer feels right on a given day, I’ll do it.

Relatedly, I’m an out-of-sight, out-of-mind kind of person. So if I’ve hung the clothes out on the line, I need to set myself a reminder timer or alarm to go fetch them.

Pro tip to set it for a time of day that makes sense:
Midafternoon when the kids are watching a show? Great.
In the middle of dinner prep when everyone’s needy and manic? Not great.
After the kids’ bedtime when you’re spent and just want to put your feet up? Not great.

It’s important to me to have peace in my home. Laundry with a family can be so much harder than laundry as a solo person not only because there’s so much more, but also because it’s easy to fall into resentment if you’re doing it all. Instead of stewing in resentment, I practice noticing the feeling and allowing it to inform me that I want things to be different.

Your turn!

Mom Win: Laundry Reality Check

Take a minute to answer these questions, either in your head, in your journal, or in your phone's notes app:

(1) When it comes to laundry, it’s important to me that

Name what’s important to you so you can build a system that supports it.

(2) I see this about myself (in this season)

Name and accept what’s hard so you can work with it.

(3) I see this about my family members (in this season)

Name and accept your family’s strengths and weaknesses so you can set your expectations and build in accommodations.

This approach to doing laundry will make your life easier

I’m not afraid of overstating that!

Laundry can be overwhelming, especially for busy moms managing large families and various household chores. The relentless cycle of dirty clothes hampers overflowing with clothes from every family member, including kids’ laundry, kid’s clothes, small items, and baby laundry, can make it feel like an unattainable task.

The mini course "Ready Set Moms Do Laundry" offers practical ideas and a sustainable framework to help simplify and systematize laundry.